if youre ever a customer and you order off menu, fuck you

@pikachu “I come here all the time, everyone loves me! I know all the ‘secret menu’ items!”

*the entire staff lining up in the kitchen to spit in their food*

@sweetmercury anyone who thinks restaurants have "secret menus" are assholes who dont understand how the chef is bending over backwards to fix up their impossible order

@pikachu @sweetmercury True custome story. Drunk guy in cowboy hat walks into a pizza place. Demands pizza with lots of hot red pepper cuz he's from Tex-ass. Old Italian owner dumps entire bottle of red pepper on his order. He takes one bite, gags and runs out of place. Staff applaud wildly. The end.

@StevenDBT @sweetmercury running gag in our kitchen is a dude who ordered a pizza with pepperoni, but hadn't clarified if he meant the little pepperonis or the salami kind. So we put salami on his pizza, he comes to pick it up, leaves, calls back twenty minutes later and screams into the telephone "I HATE PEPPERONI SALAMI!!!!!!" so now we just yell that at each other whenever we're using it

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