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*clutches chest*
Me, on a hill: dammit, this was not the hill I wanted to die on

*city puts up memorial to me on Bad Opinion Hill*

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They should call them “nutchuks” for how often I hit my nuts with these things

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When you roast someone’s taste in apples, that’s a Braeburn

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I write edgy jokes. They don’t make you laugh, but they get you real close

Call me what you will, but I think Bill&Ted 3 will be the greatest film of our lifetime

Guess who’s coaching little league baseball like a sucker?

We didn't take a fuckin pic!! have you millennials ever heard of just *experiencing* things! wtf

You, good at hot sex: biker jacket, baby
Me, silly person: maybe I'll just leave my socks on

What's up gamers? dirt here with a very special message: Show more

I love seeing peoples train selfies, but it makes me wonder why all the mbta's trains have to be so bleak and uninviting

what do you call an anti-social caterpillar? Show more

If anyone ever does really want to bait me, start loudly proclaiming which states make up "the Midwest" and also start saying the Midwest is bad

[Hastily shoving a map entitled "Which States I Think Are Midwest States" into a desk drawer]

It honestly rules how hissily defensive we all are of this platform most of us have been on for less than a year

Grimace is named after an expression. That’s beautiful

Show more is Fast and Stable instance.
This instance isn't focused on any theme or subject, feel free to talk about whatever you want. Although the main languages are English and Japanese, We accept every single language and country.
Everyone is welcome as long as you follow our code of conduct!