when you’re looking at your phone and you notice out of your peripheral a man approaching you as if to talk, the key is that you must not flinch, you must not allow a single hair on your head to move. you must keep typing, keep scrolling. do not attempt to even glance sideways to get a better view of him. trust your gut. stay strong. become one with your phone. do not move your gaze, for they can smell uncertainty, and will speak unprovoked.
DAMN i feel this
@pbandkate fun fact: as long as you don't look at him, he remains Bryce Youngquist
we're kind of the universes default character template for a white guy
@bryceyoungquist ahvawyBNahwvs bryce im yelling
@bryceyoungquist this is my new belief system, thank you
@bryceyoungquist OH GOD I CANT DO IT i just looked at two men on the train and imagined you dying and got really sad im sorry im de-converting from bryce youngquistism
@pbandkate *extremely the dictates of the faith are not for everyone. this is understandable voice* Bryce Youngquist.
@SanfordianPhil @pbandkate well, you spontaneously come into being fully formed, with memories of walking up to them, in the moment of my agonizing death. it turns out the world functions a lot like the unreal engine. you require a lot more processing power to render than a Bryce Youngquist does, this is an easy way to reduce server load
@pbandkate I made this mistake just last week 😵
@vy i am glad you survived
Knzk.me is Fast and Stable instance.
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