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when you’re looking at your phone and you notice out of your peripheral a man approaching you as if to talk, the key is that you must not flinch, you must not allow a single hair on your head to move. you must keep typing, keep scrolling. do not attempt to even glance sideways to get a better view of him. trust your gut. stay strong. become one with your phone. do not move your gaze, for they can smell uncertainty, and will speak unprovoked.

@pbandkate fun fact: as long as you don't look at him, he remains Bryce Youngquist

we're kind of the universes default character template for a white guy

@pbandkate every time you look up, you kill me, Bryce Youngquist. but I endure, as part of my sacred task to #respect #women.

it hurts a great deal every time.

@bryceyoungquist OH GOD I CANT DO IT i just looked at two men on the train and imagined you dying and got really sad im sorry im de-converting from bryce youngquistism

@pbandkate *extremely the dictates of the faith are not for everyone. this is understandable voice* Bryce Youngquist.

@SanfordianPhil @pbandkate well, you spontaneously come into being fully formed, with memories of walking up to them, in the moment of my agonizing death. it turns out the world functions a lot like the unreal engine. you require a lot more processing power to render than a Bryce Youngquist does, this is an easy way to reduce server load

@bryceyoungquist @pbandkate ah, ok so like we're both generated, I can get behind that part. So like until they look up just a low rez version of your avi is floating there?

@SanfordianPhil @pbandkate oh no, it's a fully functional Bryce Youngquist. hands, eyes, feet, stubble, opinions about financial deregulation, #respect for #women, whole shebang.

@bryceyoungquist @pbandkate I'm gonna sit here and think about the phrase "fully functional Bryce Youngquist" in silence for a while

@SanfordianPhil @bryceyoungquist @pbandkate I'm like actively trying to imagine a non-horny riff on this Bryce Younglore and drawing a complete blank

@byttyrs @bryceyoungquist @pbandkate there's a emperor palpatine riff in there somewhere but I can't get the wording right

@SanfordianPhil @byttyrs @pbandkate part of the reason i require little processing power is i have very few actual functions. most of them are just a couple dozen variations on bryceyoungquist.mp3

@bryceyoungquist @byttyrs @pbandkate feels like having one and a small audio mixer program would give more versatility for about the same space but who am I to argue with the designers

@SanfordianPhil @bryceyoungquist @pbandkate the Bryce Youngdata contains only an audio mixer with a couple dozen presets, bryceyoungquist.mp3 is a globally-accessible variable

@bryceyoungquist @wintgenstein @pbandkate oh gdi I thought this was some rando, stop changing your avi and name rico!

@wintgenstein @bryceyoungquist @pbandkate true, sorry but some name and picture you don't recognize starts talking about Rick and Morty you freeze like a deer in headlights ya know?

@bryceyoungquist @pbandkate okay so wait, is there a permanent token of Bryce Youngquist out there? like, is there a Bryce Youngquist who persists upon collapsing his wave function by observing him? or does Bryce Youngquist ONLY and EVERYWHERE exist where a man is currently unobserved

@jimpjorps @byttyrs @pbandkate i am not a person who ever actually laughs out loud at shit he sees on the internet. i have just laughed out loud at this.

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Knzk.me

Knzk.me is Fast and Stable instance.
This instance isn't focused on any theme or subject, feel free to talk about whatever you want. Although the main languages are English and Japanese, We accept every single language and country.
Everyone is welcome as long as you follow our code of conduct!


Status: status.knzk.me