Pinned toot

got my driving test score: perfect 100 mph. the instructor couldn't stop screaming.

Pinned toot

you maybe say im a dreamer

its because i keep telling you my dreams

garfield is a marxist that's why he hates mondays

really disappointed by how not hyper "hypertext" is tbh

found some people talking about my podcast on reddit and debating whether to wade into the controversy

i don't know what's happening but i have to be moisturized 24/7 now

just lol if you aren't constantly rewriting your toots terrified of sounding like a reply guy

excuse me, the new president of nintendo is named BOWSER???

just went to a mensa meeting but all we did was watch rick and morty

"These are not the jorts you're looking for."

a bonkers dm i got on bird site from a jesus lady Show more

"Now the story of a TV show that was cancelled in 2006 and brought back 7 years later, even though its humor hadn't evolved at all. It's...

Arrested Development."

Movie pitch: The Truman Show but it's about Harry S. Truman

@omgwtfbible @sophia The Truman Show but it's Aaron Sorkin in a potemkin reality and it isn't filmed

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