Pinned toot

Seriousposting Show more

Never mind I'm not doing this anymore and it's @burgin's fault

Also if any of you say "horny" or anything similar I will block you I swear to god

Okay I just discovered this emoji maker so give me an emotion and I'll make an emoji that represents it once I wake up

No but seriously though. What is objectively the loudest food.

me: skulking down the street clutching a large cherry cola and a double cheeseburger
some guy: what the fuck is that a fuckin cat?

truth Show more

No one ever wants to point out that nerds are the ones responsible for a lot of bad things

"baron trump" is a cartoon villain name. there is no more evil name for captain, leader, etc. than "baron", and trump means "victory over others". baron trump is the evil versoin of captain victory

The best way to tell whether a fellow leftist is Good or not is to decide whether you would want them at your birthday party.

Like, at the end of the day, when y'all are done throwing molotovs and erecting statues of workers and all that, what's next? Y'all better be pleasant to be around because while I want to not have a world run by debt or exploitation, I also do not want to live in a world with only angry leftists who can't unclench for one gotdam minute.

I would pay Louie zong ten million dollars just to have him follow me around and make little soundtracks for my daily chores and other assorted tasks

white leds don't emit light directly - they excite a phosphor, similar to how a crt works.

and we're slowly using them to replace orange sodium vapor streetlights.

what i mean is, someday the sky over _every_ port will _literally_ be the color of a television tuned to a dead channel.

me, onstage at tootcon 2020: [visibly unhinged] okay alright. you got it out of me. I keep posting about dabbing for the Internet points but I don't dab and I don't think dabbing is that funny. the faves and the boosts keep rolling in for my relatable content but the dirty truth is that I can't relate. are you happy now? are you glad you cracked me??
the very nice MC: ma'am we're trying to do a panel right now,

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