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proud to announce that i am now managing a boy band! they are 5 extraordinarily talented young men and they all look just like Chris Kirkpatrick did in 1998

One day I'm gonna meet Bat Boy and we're gonna go on all sorts of adventures until the FBI catches up to us and we're forced to drive off a cliff into the Grand Canyon like Thelma and Louise

I spent a couple minutes looking at the Guido Voice Twitter account and now all my thoughts are in that accent

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KT 🐧 boosted

Minimum ages in the US:
buy cigarettes: 18
smoke cigarettes: 20
vote: 22
marital sex: 23
buy alcohol: 25
pre-marital sex: 26
drink alcohol: 27
rent a car: must be a boomer
join the military: 14
buy a gun (in person): 11
buy a gun (online): 12
drive a tractor: 7

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I'm a little bit baby
She's a little bit monky

If we all ate just a little bit of garbage everyday, within a year there would be somewhat less garbage

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KT 🐧 boosted

@Katie I actually pronounce it “butts dot team” when saying it out loud, but I think “butt steam” works just fine, personally

@zenhob Zack I always forget to ask but is your instance pronounced Butts Team or Butt Steam? Bc I always pronounce it in my head as Butt Steam

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i really do want to emphasize that my love of taco bell is in no way ironic. I really do really love taco bell. they're probably the best restaurant in america for their price point. a meal at taco bell is as exemplary an execution of what its trying to do as any Michelin starred restaurant

Promoted by Taco Bell™: Live Más™

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My dad texts me once a week and it's always this message

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KT 🐧 boosted

hate when i open a cw labeled "alch" and it isnt about sealing their little brothers soul inside a giant suit of armor

i was just half sleeping, thinking of these two beauty gurus and at some point I thought "man, i don't get it. i've never seen them wear makeup. i don't even think they can speak" which is when my brain woke up and i realized i was thinking about my cats and not makeup youtubers

Baby, all my underpants are crotchless. I have to get them specially made that way. Regular underwear doesn't fit anymore. My crotch was blown off in the war.

wtf.... just learned about all the bad stuff OJ Simpson did... can't believe the nice guy from the Naked Gun movies was capable of robbery...

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This instance isn't focused on any theme or subject, feel free to talk about whatever you want. Although the main languages are English and Japanese, We accept every single language and country.
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